Every night I light 2 candles, one for Pax and one for Catherine. I leave them burning until I'm ready to (try to) go to sleep. Then I pray for the children, or I talk to them, and blow them out.
I keep the matches I use to light the candles, eventually burning them, and keeping the ashes.
Yes I have a box of ashes from the matches from the candles.
I Have many physical reminders of my children all around me, and I bet some people reading this might wish me to "move on ".
But it doesn't make any difference whether I have these comforting little rituals. My sorrow and loss is not going away. I can be somewhere completely new, watching something I've never seen before --like yesterday at the gymnastic display at a country fair, and My thoughts go to my kids and the experiences they did and didn't have.
That's the story of a bereaved mother.
Catherine with the dog we got her. His name was Barney and he was a good companion until she was nolonger able to take care of him.
Catherine aged about 2, having a run around with a ball.
Pax feeding pigeons, about 2
I keep the matches I use to light the candles, eventually burning them, and keeping the ashes.
Yes I have a box of ashes from the matches from the candles.
I Have many physical reminders of my children all around me, and I bet some people reading this might wish me to "move on ".
But it doesn't make any difference whether I have these comforting little rituals. My sorrow and loss is not going away. I can be somewhere completely new, watching something I've never seen before --like yesterday at the gymnastic display at a country fair, and My thoughts go to my kids and the experiences they did and didn't have.
That's the story of a bereaved mother.
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